Romance can induce a lot of people to do illogical things.
It’s just how human beings are wired.
This is why there are so many ways relationships between people can be so complex that even a quantum computer cannot make sense of it.
I’ve seen numerous types of complicated relationships between people. Sometimes they involve 3 people, sometimes 4.
And disturbingly… sometimes 5 or more.
So a man who has a girlfriend but sleeps with you is not as complicated as various other situations other people might be in.
Yet that does not mean that it’s perfectly normal.
As a civilized society, we are taught to have one partner at anyone time.
Whether that is right or wrong is up to personal opinion.
But if you are reading this, you have probably found yourself in a confusing situation. And you are seeking more answers no necessarily to find a solution, but maybe to understand a little bit more about what’s going on.
Maybe he’s married, maybe he has a girlfriend. It doesn’t matter.
What matters is that he goes home to someone else after sleeping with you. And that hits you at a spot that is starting to be painful.
The first thing we have to accept is that men have a strong natural urge to have sex with as many women as possible so as to spread their genetic seeds.
This urge might not be as strong today as it was centuries ago. But it would still be there even if it’s just a subtle urge.
So they can be easily be tempted to accept a “free meal” when one is presented on table.
But a sensual desire is not the main reason when he sleeps with you behind his girlfriend’s back.
The biggest issue is almost always about his masculinity, or lack of, when in the presence of his wife or girlfriend.
He needs to feel like a man at home and his current partner is not delivering in his aspect.
This could be that his wife continuously nags at him, boring sex, or even because he has started to find her habits disgusting and repulsive.
He needs to feel femininity again and you have become the source of that fulfillment.
Whether you treat this as a casual relationship or want it to become something more than that is a personal choice.
But the longer this backdoor relationship stays secret, the lesser your chances of him becoming your boyfriend.
This is because he has accepted (Maybe sub-consciously) that he can get what he needs without committing to you.
And with this success, he feels that he can do the same with another women even if you leave him.
When such relationships drag on, the possibility of an open relationship diminishes.
Keep in mind that the fact that there must be some big reason(s) he is still holding onto his current partner. And he might never reveal that to you.
It could be a financial need, a comfort zone he is unwilling to leave, or even some sick version of loyalty.
This implies that the only reason he would willingly and happily leave his girlfriend for you would be that you can meet those undeclared needs of his.
But as stated previously, it’s almost always about masculinity.
He doesn’t feel like a man when he don’t make enough money, he feels like a loser when he cannot accept change, and he questions his own manhood when he cannot do what his head tells him to.
The thing is that if you can make him feel like a man whenever he is with you, the odds of him leaving his girlfriend for you would be very high.
If you don’t care about his financial issues, bad decisions or failures, you become the pillar of emotional support that he secretly craves.
This is not a complete list of his problems. But you get the picture.
The reason he is sleeping with you could also be an attempt to test you out.
He wants to find out whether you would be worth leaving his current partner for.
Do you love him enough to put everything including your reputation on the line. Are you crazy about him enough to make illogical choices. And how would you behave when you have got him in the bag.
This is because he might risk everything by throwing everything down and being with you.
And that is a risk that any logical man would take seriously.